Hedonistic Prayers

So some of us were praying together at the church on Wednesday. That's the day we call the church to fast and pray. I'm asking, "What are you praying about today." One answer came from a young woman who is praying for a friend. Said friend grew up in Christian fundamentalism, which she ran away from a long time ago. After figuring out she could talk to men without going to hell (that didn't happen until she was well on the east side of 20 yr old) she has apparently forgotten those old passionately taught inhibitions. Now, with two Christian friends walking life with her, she's thinking about God again for the first time in about 8 years.

"How do I pray for my friend?"

1) Let me say first, thank you thank you thank you thank you for doing what you're doing. What normal people need (around the Athens Vineyard, we call 'non-christians' normal people. Which they are. We're the weird ones. You know, even Peter said we were a peculiar people, and holiness refers to people or things that are 'called out' and set apart from the norm. Well back to my thought . . .) What normal people need is to have Christian friends. Christians who choose them, and not as an evangelistic mark, but an authentic relationship. Even so, when you have a relationship, especially if you prove to be a good friend, you will have a voice they will listen to. So thank you for being a caring, steady, reliable friend for a young woman who will probably drag you through a few mudholes along the way.

2) The way to pray that seems right is to ask God to make everything fail that she is looking for to make her happy. You know, we pretty much always make decisions based on what we believe will make us happy. And if we believe that a relationship is going to do it for us, it's very difficult to believe that submitting to God (esp the bad experience God) is going to make us happy. We may feel guilty for not obeying him, but we won't be compelled to obey him if we don't think he will be the happiest choice. So to pray that all our other options will fail seems a bold and wise decision. Bold, because it implies that we are asking for someone to hurt, to experience failure, maybe heartbreak.

3) Then pray that God will manifest in some way as the one with the most promise. This will likely need to be presented by some Christian who understands grace, mercy, and exhibits lots of patience - all without judgement. Are there any of those around?

Diversity

Had lunch with a friend today. We were talking about diversity, especially racial diversity. And how we'd love to see more of it in the church. Our church. When John got to see what was going on in heaven, he saw people from every tribe and nation worshiping God. I got this idea from somebody somewhere that the church on earth should strive to look like heaven. I don't know if that's true, but it sounds good. If it is true, then I want our church to have people from all kinds of backgrounds and races worshiping with us. Of course, I know that the most likely scenario is that people are going to worship in a place where people see things pretty much similarly. Maybe that makes it less likely that we will attract very many Koreans who don't speak much english, or cowboys who hate our music. I don't know. But I'd settle for every red and yellow black and white person who looks at the world kind of like we do, and likes our really cool music, to come and join us for the Vineyard ride in Athens. IOW, I'm willing to be intentional about sending the message that we really want to be a diverse crowd. Not that we would tolerate it. Not even that we would embrace it. But that we will pursue it. Passionately.

Life

You know what? Sometimes life is just hard. It hurts. And things don't even have to be going bad, either. You simply feel very little more than pain. And you wonder where God is. Or you wonder if God is. I think those times are important.

God allows us plenty of opportunity to doubt. A past teacher of mine always said, "God will allow all his promises to be called into question." With this in mind, I'm thinking about Paul saying "If in this life only we have hoped in Christ, we are of all people most to be pitied." Why am I thinking of this? Because it's when life is hard and when we're asking the hard questions that we want to punt the whole thing and stop believing the promises. But instead, we keep on believing, and hoping, that the promises are true. So we don't sin. Or we don't pursue whatever it is that we would pursue if we didn't hope in God. So we miss out on a lot that the world has to offer. Thus Paul's logic. We're really stupid to live like we do if there's no reward for following Jesus.

But what if we're just giving lip service to the Jesus thing, and our life wouldn't really be different without him?

Hmmmmmmmmmmmm.

My only answer is that my faith better be reflected in my life choices, or it's no faith at all. Soooooo, when life is hard, and it hurts, I hang on. I keep talking to God. Or, sometimes I don't. I cave. And I act like a whore, and sleep with my suitors. But they leave me wanting. So I want to come back. And I feel like he won't have me.

A friend of mine wrote this Poem:

Waking up next to God

I.
If I were your friend
I would tell you that you are
An idiot
that you are
being laughed at
that you are making a fool of yourself.

But I am not your friend,
I am your beloved.

Infidelity, betrayal, abandonment
Fiction, lies, and damned lies
Are common currency
In our house
Fueled by my anger
at your faithfulness.

You will never know
how guilt
ferments into anger
Every time I return,
Late with another’s kisses on my lips
Bruised and sore
From a night of wanton dissolution
(let’s be honest, infuriated lust)
Only to find
That yet again
You have left
dinner in the oven
Desert in the fridge
And forgiveness in your note
To me
Which reads

Please
Never stop coming back.


II.
Sliding my legs between the sheets
I hear your soft and steady breathing
Which tells me that you sleep easy,
Free from torment
While I, freshly showered
To wash away the scent of my sin
Struggle with anger
That melts into sorrow
And sinks into weeping
Until
I feel your arms wrap around me
Cradling me with a love so warm
My tears soften into sleep
Barely registering the truth
That you were not sleeping
After all.

Jim Evans

Isn't it true?

Getting What You Want

Have you ever wished you could have whatever you wanted? I mean anything. I was reading something recently about Bill Gates. He was talking about the fact that he could have anything he wanted. That's got to be mostly true. At least if money can buy it. But you and I both know that money can't buy everything. And I know that if I were Bill Gates, there would be something out there that I wanted but couldn't have. So there's nobody who can really have whatever he/she wants.

Except God.

God can have whatever he wants. Anything. Anything. If he wants it, he can have it. There is nothing nothing nothing he could want that he couldn't have. (Don't start with the big rock thing!)

Does this thought intrigue you like it does me? I mean, now I want to go back to the bible and look for what God wants. What does he want. I'm working with the assumption here that he can have what he wants.

Pay careful attention to yourselves and to all the flock, in which the Holy Spirit has made you overseers, to care for the church of God, which he obtained with his own blood.
(Acts 20:28)

knowing that you were ransomed from the futile ways inherited from your forefathers, not with perishable things such as silver or gold, but with the precious blood of Christ, like that of a lamb without blemish or spot.
(1 Peter 1:18-19)

looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured from sinners such hostility against himself, so that you may not grow weary or fainthearted. In your struggle against sin you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood. And have you forgotten the exhortation that addresses you as sons? "My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord, nor be weary when reproved by him. For the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and chastises every son whom he receives." It is for discipline that you have to endure. God is treating you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline?
(Hebrews 12:2-7)

God, who can have anything he wants, paid a precious price - - for you.